Island paradise, here we come!

I'm dumping the hubby and going to paradise with 3 fabulous girls. We girls have been planning this trip since we were in secondary school (I even wrote a whole story when I was in Form 2 about us going on a trip like this... though it turned out to be a weird story with a silly ending). Can't believe we are finally going at last!~~~~

And I have a confession to make. I'm more excited about this trip than I was for my honeymoon. ;)

Buai buai... see you... buai buai... see you... (if you know Ian's kid, then you kinda know what I'm trying to say here).

My Sister’s Keeper

My all-time favorite novels are The Time Traveler’s Wife, Marley and Me and A Thousand Splendid Suns.

Joining that list today is, My Sister’s Keeper

 Image from wikipedia

I love love love love love this book. Was reading it until 1am last night. Brought the book to work today to finish the last few chapters (Don't tell the boss ya).


I'm too lazy to write the synopsis, so click here to read the synopsis. Else you can probably skip the rest of this post.

I no longer enjoy books like Sydney Sheldon or Dan Brown who are good at spinning a dramatic storyline, but the moment you finish the book it’s forgotten and done with hardly any memorable quotes.
Now I prefer books that touch the very basics of life. Books that after finishing it, it makes me ponder and think. Books that deliver a message to teach.

My Sister’s Keeper is a good book that makes you think. I hated the mother in the book, but I couldn’t help thinking… what would I do if I were her? I admire Anna’s decision to fight over the right of her own body, but I couldn’t help thinking… is that right so important that she’s willing to let her sister die? Jesse was such a messed up kid, but I also felt so sad for him for always being neglected. I adored the dad and how much he tried to makes things right. And I loved Campbell, the lawyer and Julia, his ex-girlfriend, who sometimes provide comic relief to a very depressing story line.

A wonderful beautiful heart-warming story that leaves you to think… what would you do if you were them? And just like what my sister said, after you finish the book, you’ll turn back to the first page and start wondering.

However, I also kinda guessed how the ending would be, even though I wasn't sure how it would happen. Because of that, I was slightly disappointed with the ending. I still love the book though. :)

And please, if you’re thinking of being lazy and watching the movie instead, the movie has a TOTALLY different ending and some characters were cut out. I always wonder why movie makers almost always change the storyline of a popularly received novel. And if there’s a briefly mentioned love interest in the book, Hollywood makers will blow it up, focus on it and throw in some added sex. Hollywood movies will always be Hollywood movies. Sheshhhh.

Anyone who wants to borrow the book from me, let me know.

Back in the office

I'm back at work. And you know what? I was actually looking forward to going back to work. I even started thinking about work yesterday, planning which SPRs I was going to fix.

I know what you are saying. Yes, you.. and you... and you at the back there. You are all thinking the same thing. So everybody, all together now say, "SIAO WAN!!" (translation: you crazy nut case, how could you be happy going back to work during CNY?).

But wait, let me explain why I'm so happy to be at work.

While you out there are sweating your balls out in this damn freaking it's-so-hot-I-could-die weather..... I'm enjoying the cold office air-conditioning, so cold that I may even have to wear a cardigan.

While you out there are stuck in an hour-long traffic jam at Gurney Drive..... I'm driving at 90 on the highway, reaching work in 10 minutes.

While you out there are circling round and round like a desperate vulture, looking for a parking space..... I'm seeing so many empty parking spaces that I have to make tough decisions like, "Should I choose the parking space nearest to the door? Or should I should park at the one further but under the tree shade? Hmmm...."

While you are out there are having to queue up and kiasu-ly fight over a free table in a chaotically full restaurant..... I'm at a calm nice restaurant being served immediately.

While you are out there sitting among screaming children and extremely loud relatives, so loud that no matter how much you turn up the TV volume, you'll still have to read the subtitles..... I'm enjoying the peace of the super quiet office where the sounds of the typing on keyboard and the humming of my machine are like music to my ears.

Other reasons why I'm glad I'm at work.

1. To the hubby, CNY means eating unhealthy food and drinking sugar-water (can and box drinks) the whole entire day. Give him plain water and he'll say, "Dowan... no taste". And I, who is too lazy to get my own water, ends up drinking sugar water as well which never quenches my thirst. By the 3rd day of CNY, I gave up and got up to get plain drinking water.
2. No more chaotic reunions. Peace and quiet. But I have to say CNY this year is a lot more better. I only received one "when are you going to have a baby?" question, a large improvement from last year when I received multiple, "You gained weight la, are you pregnant?" questions. In fact this year, I received a, "Ah How, lu eh bor sui loh" (You hear that, hubby? Somebody said your wife is pretty AH!!). I knew aerobics for the past one year would pay off. ;)
3. Now that I'm back to my old routine, it means I'm back to eating my apple in the morning, my brown rice for meals, and my vitamins at night. No more unhealthy sweet stuff, no more rubbish, no more skipping main meals because of losing my appetite due to excess sugar water. (I was damn constipated for the past few days because of all the junk I was feeding my poor body)
4. And seriously, the weather is really WTF-ly hot lately. It's the only time you'll see me sprinting 10 feet in front of Yin How, mumbling "it's HOT, it's HOT, it's HOT". The moment I get out of the car, it's a mad dash to walk towards the shelter. 

Anyway, I was feeling very happy to be back until I sat in my cubicle and the boss who has one and only engineer left in office, took out his machine gun and starting shooting SPRs at me at full blast. 

Oh well... SPRs or chaotic CNY??? I'm thinking SPRs...

:)

The inexperience

This is what happens when a person with no experience with children decides to take a hyper-active 3-year-old and a 1-year-old to the playground.

I clearly have a lot to learn about handling children. ;)

What attracts a woman?

A couple of days ago, I was talking with a friend about how to "kau lui" (court a girl). When I was asked how to tell whether a girl is attracted to a guy, I suddenly went blank.

Being with the same man for the last 10 years this was something that happened so long ago. The hubby and I have officially entered the "boring married couple" stage but have yet to enter the "I'm-sick-to-death-with-you" stage. I know this for a fact because when I have horny dreams at night, the hubby is still the main star in the dream... and not some other fantasy guy yet. Since I can't control what I dream, that has to be proof that I'm still attracted to the hubby right? ;)

After being blank for a while, I tried to recall how Yin How attracted me. Usually when I do this, only 2 flashbacks appear.

Flashback number 1: 

Yin How snatching my photo from my hand, then calling me back at night to say I looked fat. (And I don't think he ever gave me back that photo).

Flashback number 2: 

Yin How throwing stones at me outside the lecture hall to get my attention.

Yes, that's how my dear future hubby courted me 10 years ago. But when I think back about the other guys did, I can't remember much. However 10 years later, I still remember what the hubby did (and still can feel the geram-ness).

Which leaves to me conclude, girls find naughty boys attractive.

At least for younger girls. Why? Because they are never boring. Take a look of how many "good girl falls in love with bad boy, then proceeds to mold bad boy into good boy for marrying potential" movies out there. 


Anyway, I've compiled a list which I think makes a man attractive. However, what attracts me may not be attractive to other girls. So girls, if you anything to add, please do so.

1. Must be confident in himself but not arrogant
2. Must be able to make her laugh
3. I personally get attracted to a guy who likes to tease a girl now and then (in a non-insulting way of course). It makes the relationship more fun.
4. Must have a direction/goal in his life
5. Able to look after himself, doesn't expect the woman to do all the chores. Plus plus points for a guy who knows how to cook.
6. Kind to animals (because if you're kind to animals, chances are you will probably be kind-hearted in general).
7. Knows how to look good, but must not be vain having more beauty products than me.
8. Must not be too sentimental. I'll get really worried if the guy I'm with cries more than me. @.@
9. A typical guy who enjoys sports and other guy-ish stuff. A manly kind of guy.

The thing that still attracts me is the hubby's cheeky smile. I adore that. But sometimes I find it annoying. Like the time when my mother-in-law bought a very very very auntie-ish-looking pair of slacks for someone, the hubby lied to me and said that his mum bought it for me.

I.... was.... horrified!  @.@

She asked me whether it looked nice, and through my frozen smile I squeaked out, "Yes, auntie, it looks very nice!" (Eh, all daughter-in-laws lie to their mother-in-laws okay so don't judge!). She replied, "You like it ah... I bought this for xxxx wan. I'll go back and buy one for you."

Stupid Yin How was giggling silently in the corner. If looks could kill, he would have been dead by then.

Also, another thing I find. A guy can't be tooo nice to a girl, or she will take you for granted and might see you as a brother. However, you must still treat her good to make her feel special. Kinda complicated right? What do you think?

Cards

I love getting cards. Every since I was young, I've been collecting birthday cards, valentine day cards, festive greeting cards. I just love feeling all nostalgic when I go through all my cards, each representing a year in my life.

Only problem is that I've got bad memory recognizing them. I once bought my mum the same card two years in a row. She noticed, I didn't (very bad, very bad). And there was once, much to the dismay of the sister, I bought her the exact same birthday card she bought me. And our birthdays are only two months apart.

Yesterday I was looking for something in the drawer where I keep all my cards. Saw a Valentine's day card and was a little confused. "Yin How, which year this you buy this card for me?" Before he could open his mouth, I threatened, "Did you buy me a Valentine's day card for tomorrow?"

The hubby gave me a dirty look. "That IS the Valentine's day card for tomorrow laaaa".

I immediately transformed from threatening-wife to lovable-giggly-girl. Took the card and skipped all the way to the bookshelf and proudly displayed the card.

It's so easy to please a women. And you men say women are complicated. I think you're just not trying hard enough. Hmphhh.

Happy Valentine's Day!

:)



BTW, why am I still at home blogging on the morning of CNY? Because all the hubby's obsessive preparation for this day has worn him out, so he's still in bed sleeping right now. ;)

It's that time of the year when I need to rant

The long weekend is coming and usually by this time and I'll be too happy jumping up and down, constantly checking the time shown at the bottom right corner of my monitor, silently counting down to 5:15pm.

However, it's not happening for this long weekend. I honestly tried to avoid writing this post but today when everybody is extra cheerful about the holidays, I'm feeling more alien then usual.

I can't help it. I need to say it again.

I HATE Chinese New Year.

There, I said it.

Try to think about this, CNY is all about family reunions right? Happy happy family reunions. Now imagine if I take that away from you. Let's just say since you were young tender mentally developing child, you grew up celebrating CNY with a lot of crying and a lot of fighting and a lot of isolation among a crowd of people. Let's say that since you were little, if you said something wrong in front of your relatives, you can expect to be punished when you come home therefore you learn that it's best to keep quiet in front of relatives and keep a distance from them. Let's say during CNY, you have to put on a fake smile in front of everybody, then go home and listen to doors slamming and lots of spiteful arguing. Let's say that's how you known CNY all your life.

Would you still enjoy CNY?

Boohoo. So what? Quit whinning. Life goes on.

Still, each year during this time, as long as I remember, I had to go through a difficult time. Only recently I stopped having to deal with the crap. But still, it's the time when I turn into the boogie monster. It's the time when my suppressed Naruto nine tail fox demon comes roaring out.

I remember once after a particularly bad CNY, somebody at work asked me how my CNY went, and I burst into tears. The poor fellow was in shock and must have been thinking, "What the hell did I say wrong?". Next thought was probably, "Slowly step away from the emotionally unstable girl" :P

So, dearest hubby, I'm sorry that your wife has CNY phobia and permanent psychological CNY damage. If it were up to me, my ideal CNY would be flying off to a non-chinese country and coming back after Chap Goh Meh.

However, I understand CNY is an important time for the hubby. I will never ever like CNY, but I shall take a deep breath and try my best-est of my best-est to do whatever I have to do for CNY (minus the obsession to keep the place spotless in time for CNY when I'm already darn tired coming home from work, my psychologically damaged brain just cannot understand the logic of why the place has to be so damn clean for CNY, and left dirty for the next 364 days. No matter how much you clean, doggies will dirty it the next day. You can never ever win against the force of the dirty doggies.).

Sigh.

The hubby just called me at work to go home and help him clean the house again. Obsessed, I tell you, he's obsessed. But can't complain, since he's doing most of the work. ;)

Sigh.

Now I just need to control my boogie monster and my Naruto nine tail fox demon, which knowing that it's this time of the year, have dropped by to say Hi.

Sigh.

Think of happy thoughts, happy happy thoughts. Think of Bali... yes Bali. Bali Bali oh Bali...

Love #2

Somebody asked my feedback for the statement below in twitter

"true love begins when nothing is looked for in return"

That statement stirred a lot of thoughts. And you know la, twitter only allows 140 characters and when replying to someone, adding the username will already take up some characters (which is why it's better to have a short username in twitter). 140 character is not enough for my reply, so decided to blab it all here.

I believe that it's a natural instinct that when you love somebody, you would want them to love you back in return. You'll do the things for him out of love. And it's natural to think that if he loves you as well, he would would do the same for you. That act of hoping he would do the same for you, is already an expectation of getting something in return.

So does it make your love less "true" just because you hope something in return, I don't think so. Because if that's the case, then I doubt anybody's love is true. Do you dare to say that you've never, not even once before, been disappointed with the one you love because of something he did or didn't do. The fact that you were disappointed was because you expected something in return.

So I do not believe that just because you love someone, you don't expect anything in return. In fact, you'll expect even more from the person you love. Take our parents for an example, they sure expect a lot from us. But I guess, then maybe true love is when you still continue loving that person even when that person doesn't give you the things that you expect in return. But is that considered blind love?

Again, I strongly believe that one-side love is not happy love. I expect that if I made sacrifices for the one I love, he must make sacrifices for me as well. I don't think I can sacrifice for a man who doesn't love me in return. I don't care if that makes me selfish because I only have one life, and I fully intend on living it as happily as I can with a man who appreciates me (and of course, if he irons his own clothes, cooks and cleans, that's like extra bonus plus plus points).

My 2 cents. :)

Love

(This is a post I actually wrote a long time ago but I didn't publish and forgot about it until I stumbled over it today.)

A few days ago, I was telling Yin How about all the crushes I had since I was a kid. I think my first crush was when I was in Standard 2 (yes, I started young). I had this crush on my class mate. 2nd crush was on a childhood friend. 3rd crush was when I was in Form 3 on a guy in tuition classes. 4th crush was in Form 4 on a guy from church.

I stopped there. Yin How looked at me waiting and said, “Then?”.
I replied, “Then what? Oh…… no, I never had a crush on you.”

Hehehehehe… (his ego was a bit deflated for a while).

Yin How was my first and only boyfriend. He chased me so I never had an initial crush on him. At that time, at 18 years old, it was really literally, "I like you, be my wife" (I repeat, wife). So simple right? At that time, excited about having my first boyfriend, I thought, “Aiyah… just try try only la, there’s nothing to lose what”…

And because he was there since the beginning, he was always a part in whatever plans I had. We grew up together, graduated from college together, found our first jobs together, put our salaries into one account, bought our first car together, bought our first home together. And then 7 years later I did marry him. And even now, I’m amaze how much I can love a person for so long. I love him even more now than then.

But as simple as things can be, the actual fact is that it's amazing that two people who are biologically so different can live together for the rest of their lives. Men and women were just made to function and think differently. So it does really take A LOT of work and effort in a relationship. But of course, if you both love each other, no amount of work is too hard. And the amount of happiness you’ll gain make is all so worth it.

I have friends who are looking for the love of their live. I have friends with complicated relationships. I have friends who are nervous about getting married.

It all can very simple. He loves you. You love him. He can’t live without you. You can’t live without him. If you have a problem with your partner, compare that problem with the thought of a life without him. See which is worst and you'll get your answer.

Also, he must love you back in return. One-sided love is not a real relationship, it’s a relationship of seeing the things you want to see, and being blind to what you don’t want to see. How long how a relationship like that last? For the rest of your life? Maybe for you, but will he commit to that for the rest of his life as well?

Fairytale romance will not last forever. Sentimental ideas will not last forever. The magical moments portrayed in movies will not last forever. What will last is the reality of waking up every morning, seeing your husband wearing his ugliest shabby pajamas, face unshaven, morning breath so foul that it will send the dogs sneezing and jumping off the bed.

Despite all of that, in your eyes you’ll think he’s still all so sexy in the morning and you'll love him a little more each day.

(Minus the morning breath, of course. That one, really can die wan okay).

Today

Today, a mum told her two-year old son who was blocking my way, "Move aside, let the che che pass". Fuiyoh! I was grinning like a maniac. Yes, I'm at the age where being called "che che" instead of auntie can make me want do a happy dance.  And I shall shameless brag about it.

Today, for some reason everything about work seemed so funny laughing until my cheeks hurt. I think the sleep deprived brain decided to go a little koo koo crazy.

Today, the hubby suddenly realized there's only 1 more week to CNY. This is the only time when I can slug on the sofa and watch the shirtless hubby obsessively clean the house while I do absolutely nothing. And yes, I'm enjoying this rare once a year sight. Like I mentioned once before, "shirtless hubby" + "doing housing chores" = "yum yum yummy" * "oolala".

Okay, end of blog post. My sleep deprived brain is rebelling against me leaving me dumb dumb blank. And I keep getting distracted from the monitor to the shirtless hubby who is currently cleaning every speck of dust from the TV shelf. I need to fully concentrate on enjoying this once in a year sight.

Nite nite.