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Every manager will one day ask themselves, why the hell am I choosing the management path? You get all the pressure coming from the top, defending your team. Then the very people you defend think you suck.

There are those that make you beam with pride and joy making you feel happy that you got to play a role in their growth. And there are those whom you try to do what's best but end up always being the bad guy in their eyes.

Every manager carries heartache and disappointment. But we still smile on the outside because it's our job to keep the team going. We swallow it and move on.

However, at home I'm no longer required to smile about my own personal problems if I don't feel like it. I'm logging off from the world for a while, from friends and family.

I appreciate that friends and family try to reach me and I know it seems like I'm shutting everybody out. But from how I grew up, I'm not used to going to people with my problems. I've learned to handle them myself.

A quick breath of air

For the first time after some time, I'm able to breath a teeny bit better. These past few weeks have been terrible. Lots of pressure from the top, from the bottom, from the side, ding dong dang. And that's when I start fantasizing about a life as a housewife. But I haven't given up yet. I have run to the toilet to have melt downs before, but I haven't given up yet.

The worst is not over yet. But I know I have good people fighting along with me.

Happy 11th Anniversary

Happy 11th anniversary hubby. Thank you for the present you bought for me (even though I know you bought it for me to shut me up to get some peace for a while). :)