Freak accident

I went to Pulau Tikus market today to eat lok lok. It was still early so only 3 tables were taken. If you've eaten lok lok before, you'll know that each table has a gas tank attached to it. I was eating happily until there was an explosion of fire under one of the lok lok tables in front of me. The pipe attached to the gas came out there was a big ball of fire under the table.

I panicked, got up but didn't run away because I was too stunned. Everbody else around was either running or screaming. The lok lok lady grabbed the gas pipe which was now like a fire gun shooting a long stream of fire. Somebody yelled at her to take out the head from the gas tank and as soon as she did, the fire went out.

I had no appetide after that. I kept thinking that if I or anybody else was sitting at that table, it would have been really bad. My legs would have been burnt and I would have been badly scarred.

I went home, looked at the smooth skin on my legs and thanked God that nothing bad happened. I won't be eatting Lok Lok for a very long time after this.

I've been a while since I've seriously blogged. My absence was due to a lot reasons.

1) Managed a team of 5 engineers
2) Which grew to 9 engineers in 3 months
3) Then received 3 resignation letters from the original engineers all in one month (I think I broke the record here)
4) Hired 2 more new engineers in 2 months, looking for one more
5) So 1 experienced engineer, 1 relatively new one and 5 new babies to look after (one more baby coming soon)
6) Crazy deadlines to meet, a huge project to drive, fires to put out, new people to train, battles to fight
7) Oh, and throw in a miscarriage, 1 week to heal physically, came back to deal with a project behind schedule and months of depression after that

Today, we meet our 2nd milestone. Somehow, dear LP and I managed to hold this new team together despite all the challenges we faced. Everyday is a battle of running to meetings, coaching new hires, talking to other teams and departments. Sometimes I hide in the toilet, sometimes in a conference room, sometimes I hide at home. If it weren't for LP, I would throw in my badge and head running to the door.

Despite it all, at this moment, I am truly contented. Just a few days ago, I was tempted to quit. But there's always that nice feeling of accomplishment when you've managed to survive yet another round of shit.

It just makes you a teeny bit stronger each time.

Hello little one

We grow up together, leave school together, graduated together, started working life together. I watched her grow up into a wonderful woman and I watched her get married to her love.

Thus, I couldn't stop smiling when I saw the little baby version of her.

Say hello to little Jayanee.

The Pagi show

Sad... looks like Phat Fabes and Ben are really leaving the Pagi show. I love those guys. They cheered up my mornings going to work.

Everybody eventually moves on I guess. Oh well...

First of many

Baby sister started her first day at work today. I still remember sitting in her dorm room on her first day at university. How fast time flies.

Now I just have to survive her first time driving to work.



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The weekend

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

I have a new goal: I am determine to get my life balanced again.

Went home before night time 3 out of 5 times last week. Feeling the improvement already compared to previous week.

The hubby and I have learned this lesson over the past year. We both have the career and the salary now, but balance is just as important. Time to let go a little.

On a side note, I'm become one of them iphone freaks. It's like chocolate. If you never tasted it before, you won't know what you've been missing all this while.

My 2nd goal is to convince the sister to get an iphone with her first paycheck. :)

...

Every manager will one day ask themselves, why the hell am I choosing the management path? You get all the pressure coming from the top, defending your team. Then the very people you defend think you suck.

There are those that make you beam with pride and joy making you feel happy that you got to play a role in their growth. And there are those whom you try to do what's best but end up always being the bad guy in their eyes.

Every manager carries heartache and disappointment. But we still smile on the outside because it's our job to keep the team going. We swallow it and move on.

However, at home I'm no longer required to smile about my own personal problems if I don't feel like it. I'm logging off from the world for a while, from friends and family.

I appreciate that friends and family try to reach me and I know it seems like I'm shutting everybody out. But from how I grew up, I'm not used to going to people with my problems. I've learned to handle them myself.

A quick breath of air

For the first time after some time, I'm able to breath a teeny bit better. These past few weeks have been terrible. Lots of pressure from the top, from the bottom, from the side, ding dong dang. And that's when I start fantasizing about a life as a housewife. But I haven't given up yet. I have run to the toilet to have melt downs before, but I haven't given up yet.

The worst is not over yet. But I know I have good people fighting along with me.

Happy 11th Anniversary

Happy 11th anniversary hubby. Thank you for the present you bought for me (even though I know you bought it for me to shut me up to get some peace for a while). :)