CNY? :(

Chinese New Year is not a good time for me. In fact it's the worst time of the year for me. Because of family problems, CNY for me involves having to put on a fake smile in front of everybody then having the day end with lots of fighting and crying at home.

Now as an adult, I no longer have to go through that anymore. But the childhood memories are still there.

My most ideal CNY would be taking a one week holiday far away where I don't have to do things I don't want to do. But being someones wife now, I cannot do that as I have an obligation to spend CNY with his family. Though I wish he could truly understand what CNY really means to me.

Yes, I am a Chinese who grew up without a Chinese identity. The Chinese who cannot relate to any Chinese traditions, the Chinese who doesn't speak Chinese... the "fake Chinese who doesn't celebrate CNY" as my friends like to say. I am a "banana", yellow outside white on the inside, so what?

And for the record, both of us are NOT NOT NOT planning to have a baby yet. Is it compulsory that once a couple is married, they must immediately jump into bed to work on making babies? People, we are still wearing protection, so I doubt anything is going to happen unless there's that o.o1% possibility.

I don't mind people asking me the baby question, but having it asked again and again in one day? Tiring!

"When are you planning to have one?"
"You have put on weight... is it because of any good news?"
"You should start trying this year so that you'll get one by next year"
"Everybody has kids now, when is it your turn?"

Okay, I'm done with my ranting. Tomorrow is CNY. Be brave and SMILE through more baby questions!~~

Oh, and CNY is not all bad. It's the only time in the year when Yin How is more obsessed than me in cleaning the house. I, of course, gleefully took this opportunity to get him to clean everything including the horribly messed up storeroom where you cannot enter but only throw things in. It's almost 10:30pm and he's busy mopping the floor... the 2nd time already. :)

Happy Chinese New Year everybody. May your CNY be less tiring than mine. :)